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Jesus Just Told Me He Probably Wouldn’t Vote for the “Rapey Sore Loser Guy”
Well, America, you're about to do it. Again.
We're gonna have a re-do of 2020. It's gonna be Biden vs. Trump again. When it was...
Jesus: “Silencing Transgender People Isn’t Christian, It’s Cunty”
"I specifically told people to stop being judgmental little twatwaffles to everyone."
In Montana, elected Republicans have effectively thrown transgender Democrat Zoey Zephyr out of...
Jesus Thinks “Creepy Weirdo” Matt Walsh Should Focus on Own His Junk
Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Daily Caller commentator Matt Walsh's work. In a blog article posted to Jesus' website today, the...
Jesus Christ Wonders How Many Poor People You Can Feed for Two Super Bowl...
Today, Jesus Hubert Christ held his weekly heavenly press conference. One reporter asked the Son of God about a pair of Super Bowl commercials...
Jesus Really Loved Sam Smith’s and Kim Petras’ Grammy Performance
Many conservative commentators have been apoplectic about singers Sam Smith and Kim Petras appearance at this past weekend's Grammy Awards. Smith and Petras performed...
Jesus Can’t Figure Out Why American Christians Want to Starve Children They Force Into...
Speaking to reporters at his weekly press conference, Jesus Hubert Christ was asked for his opinions on a leaked Supreme Court opinion indicating the...
Jesus Warns His Trans Little Children to ‘Stay the Fuck Away’ From the Bible...
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Jesus Hubert Christ, son of Larry "God" Schumway, and Vice President of Holy Trinity, Inc., held an urgent press...
Jesus Christ Doesn’t ‘Have Any Fucks to Give’ About the Fox News Christmas Tree
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- This week, Conservative America has been highly focused on what is being described in certain circles as the most...
Pence Says He’s Forgiven Trump for Jan 6th Because ‘Jesus Said to Spread the...
MOSES HILLS, INDIANA -- Speaking before a packed, maskless congregation at a prayer breakfast hosted by a church in his home state, former Vice...
Jesus Now Requires a Vaccine Passport to Enter Heaven
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- If you're going to die soon, and if when you do you expect to wind up in Heaven, you...
