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Home
2017
October
Monthly Archives: October, 2017
Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
Conservative Media
God Issues Apology to Bill O’Reilly For ‘Showing Humanity What a Scumbag Sexual Predator’ He Is
"Yeah, I'm just absolutely wounded on behalf of Bill for this."
October 29, 2017
MAGA News
Jeff Sessions Starts Smoking Weed to Alleviate Stress of Russia Scandal
"This Russia shit is really getting to me, man."
October 29, 2017
MAGA News
Trump Has Sons Barricade Oval Office Door In Case Mueller Pulls Into White House Driveway
"We'll, umm, have Mexico pay for it or something. Later."
October 29, 2017
MAGA News
Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do
"We don't put people on trial for attempting to commit a crime, do we?"
October 28, 2017
Conservative Media
Hannity Summoned to White House to Soothe Trump’s Anxieties Over Mueller Charges
"I don't start any job unless I know I'm going to finish."
October 28, 2017
Criminal Justice
Robert Mueller to Hand Deliver Criminal Charges to Trump Administration Inside Dildo
"This way, one way or another you can go fuck yourself."
October 28, 2017
MAGA News
Donald Trump Jr. To Undergo Plastic Surgery For ‘Chronic Jizz Face’
The hope is that when it's completed his face will look "a lot less like someone just jizzed in it without his permission."
October 27, 2017
Criminal Justice
Cop Stops Beating Black Man Long Enough to Agree With Trump That NFL Players Are Disrespectful
"What are they even protesting, anyway?"
October 27, 2017
MAGA News
Nazi Grateful for Twitter Cleaning Up Its Platform and Suspending ‘Disgusting, Anti-Antisemite Accounts’
"It was starting to feel like a Nazi had no safe space in this country."
October 27, 2017
Criminal Justice
FBI Files Reveal JFK Link to Benghazi, Obama’s Birth Certificates, and Order 66 to Wipe Out the Jedi
"I had no idea that George Soros had Obama created out of nothing but midichlorians."
October 27, 2017
World News
George W. Bush Offers to Give Heather Lind’s Buttocks ‘The Iraq War Treatment’ for His Dad
"I want to finish once more something that you've left for me."
October 26, 2017
MAGA News
Authorities Baffled by Appearance of Giant, Rotting, Racist Pumpkin on White House Steps
"I'd call this one a Jack-OFF-o-lantern."
October 26, 2017
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Latest articles
Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
Criminal Justice
Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials
"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
April 17, 2024
Women's Rights
The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus
"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
April 12, 2024
