January 19, 2019 January 19, 2019 Adult Hitler: “I’d Totally Go Forward in Time and Kill Baby Ben Shapiro” by James Schlarmann
January 16, 2019 January 16, 2019 Men’s Rights Activist Vows to Never Shave Cousin’s Genitals with Gillette Razor Again by James Schlarmann
January 14, 2019 January 14, 2019 Trump Asks Legal Team if Sitting Presidents Can Be Indicted or Impeached During Shutdown by James Schlarmann
January 11, 2019 January 11, 2019 Don Jr. Explains Why ‘Walls Work’ and Why 6 Six Trillion Illegal Mexicans Come Over Ours Every Second by James Schlarmann
January 10, 2019 January 10, 2019 Freshman Democrat Offers Trump Thoughts and Prayers Instead of a Wall by James Schlarmann
January 9, 2019 January 9, 2019 Adderall Will Officiallly Sponsor Trump’s Next Prime Time Border Address by James Schlarmann
January 8, 2019 January 8, 2019 Mexico Agrees to Pay for Commercial Time During Trump’s Border Wall Address by James Schlarmann
January 7, 2019 January 7, 2019 Trump Offers to Scratch Border Wall in Favor of Giant Retractable Dome by James Schlarmann
January 4, 2019 January 4, 2019 2020 Democratic Contender Hopes She’s as Likable as Rage-Tweeting Racist, White Collar Crook She’d Be Facing by James Schlarmann
January 3, 2019 January 3, 2019 Nancy Pelosi Asks Bob Mueller to Swear Her In As Speaker of the House by James Schlarmann
January 2, 2019 January 2, 2019 Trump Boys “Playing Government” With Daddy During Shutdown by James Schlarmann
January 1, 2019 January 1, 2019 Donald Trump Lists ‘F**king Your Mom’ as Only New Year’s Resolution by James Schlarmann
December 29, 2018 December 29, 2018 New Mexico Trump Supporter Demands His State’s Name Be Changed to “New Freedom Land” by James Schlarmann
December 27, 2018 December 27, 2018 Trump Demands Medal of Honor for Visiting Troops in Iraq on Christmas by James Schlarmann
December 22, 2018 December 22, 2018 POLL: 60% of Americans Hoping Government Shutdown Lasts Until 2020 by James Schlarmann
December 21, 2018 December 21, 2018 Trump Nominates Putin to Replace James Mattis by James Schlarmann
December 14, 2018 December 14, 2018 Santa Claus Requests Permission from Trump to Bring Gifts to Jailed Migrant Children by James Schlarmann
December 9, 2018 December 9, 2018 Individual-1 Sent Urgent Message To David Dennison, John Barron, Donald Trump, and President of Puerto Rico by James Schlarmann
December 3, 2018 December 3, 2018 Americans Flood Heaven’s Switchboards Asking If Trump Can Take George HW Bush’s Spot by James Schlarmann
November 28, 2018 November 28, 2018 Starbucks Unveils Hanukkah, Kwanza, Church of Satan Holiday Cups by James Schlarmann
