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You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
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Women's Rights

Texas Man’s Jizz Sock Reports Him to Abortion Tip Line

CARGA DE BOLAS, TEAXS --When Gov. Greg Abbott signed Texas' new draconian abortion restriction...
Women's Rights

Mississippi Law Labels the Pull-Out Method “Proto Abortion” and Outlaws It

JACKSON, MISSISSIPPI -- Pundits have been wondering if the Supreme Court's lack of action...
Women's Rights

We Live In Texas. When Does My Wife Have to Register Her Pussy By?

Often times, we get letters. Well, okay, we really almost never get letters. But...
Women's Rights

Abbott Unsure How to Eliminate Rapists from Texas and Still Host Trump Rallies

AUSTIN, TEXGHANISTAN -- Gov. Greg Abbott (Q) promised reporters and Texghanistan natives alike this...
The Bible Belt

Pregnant Texas Woman Sues Ex-Boyfriend for Child Support

GILEAD, TEXAS -- In a case that might send reverberations throughout the Lone Star...
Food and Dining

Pro-Life Baker Devastated When Open Bag of Flour Spills and Aborts His Cake

SCHLAFLY RIVER, TEXAS-- 56-year-old Kellen Masteroni has been a baker in his small Texas...
LGTBQ+

Texas Informs Congress It Has Added “-ghanistan” to Its Name

AUSTIN, TEXGHANISTAN -- For for the first time in decades, a member of the...
Women's Rights

Texas Celebrates Its First Ever Forced Labor Day Weekend

AUSTIN, TEXASS -- All over America this weekend, people will be celebrating the achievements...
Women's Rights

“Let Me Explain Why Rapists Might Be Entitled to $10,000” by Gov. Greg Abbott

The following editorial was written by Gov. Greg Abbott (Taliban-TX), concerning his state's new...
Women's Rights

Taliban Try to Lure Women Away From Texas With Less Restrictive Laws

KABUL, AFGHANISTAN -- The Taliban are a far-right, deeply religiously fanatical group of people...
Women's Rights

Texas Man Faces Attempted Murder Charges for Finishing on His Cousin’s Stomach

GILEAD COUNTY, TEXAS -- If he had known its true, full implications, then 36...
Business

Amazon Starts Same-Day Coat Hanger Deliveries to All Texas Counties

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Retail monolith Amazon is adding a new service to certain states...
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Latest articles

Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)