Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #387

Total: Guns Confiscated by President Barack Obama (Week #387): zero

Total: Guns Confiscated by President Barack Obama (Entire Presidency):

zero

Total: Caches of Weapons and Ammunition, Seized by President Barack Obama (Week #387):

zero

Total: Caches of Weapons and Ammunition, Seized by President Barack Obama (Entire Presidency):

zero

Total: FEMA Camps Authorized, Gun Owners Incarcerated in by President Barack Obama (Week #387):

zero

Total: FEMA Camps Authorized, Gun Owners Incarcerated in by President Barack Obama (Entire Presidency):

zero

 




Total: Guns Turned Into Rainbow Firing Cannons of Gay Love by President Barack Obama (Week #387):

zero

Total: Guns Turned Into Rainbow Firing Cannons of Gay Love by President Barack Obama (Entire Presidency):

zero

Total: Second Amendments Deleted by President Barack Obama (Week #387):

zero

Total: Second Amendments Deleted by President Barack Obama (Entire Presidency):

zero

Total: Number of Americans (minority civilians or innocent cops) that need to be killed in senseless gun violence before Americans even remotely broach the subject of better handling who to give guns to:

“Fuck it, Dude. Let’s go bowling.”

James Schlarmannhttp://www.facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

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