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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #14: The Republican National Committee

Though I know it’s not going to happen, should Romney-Ryan lose in November (and the polls certainly are showing that to be a distinct possibility), the Republican party is in desperate need of a come-to-Jesus moment. They’ve been not just playing fast and loose with the truth, they have abandoned it completely. They’ve openly advocated for voter ID laws that are obvious ploys to throw Democrats off the voting rolls. And now, they’ve been exposed as participating in voting fraud themselves, which should cast doubt on every single new law and initiative put in place by Republicans in the battleground states in an attempt to swing the election for their party.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #13: Willard “Mitt” Romney

To be fair though, I should also thank Mitt for the gift he gave all of us: watching his campaign sputter and watching Fox News try as hard as they can to spin him out of this. The fact is that only those who truly hate President Obama are going to vote for Mitt Romney now. Sure, that’s a lot of people and will keep this a tight race, but if Conservatives think they’re the majority, that most Americans think this way, they’re completely delusional. They can’t even keep their reasons for hating “handouts” straight. Do they hate them all, no matter who’s getting them? Do they hate just the people who abuse them? We can’t tell. But what happened when Mother Jones released that tape is quite simple: The curtain came down and the Almighty Oz was revealed to be a smarmy, shit-eating grin in a really fucking expensive suit.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #12: Sarah Palin

This week’s award was actually very difficult to give out. The unrest in Libya and Egypt and throughout the Muslim world gave us all a glimpse into the dark heart of Republican foreign policy. It could have gone to Mitt Romney for criticizing the President for a statement released by …

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #11: The Entire Republican Party

No one should be that surprised, I suppose. When the Tea Party movement was swept into power in 2010, they immediately set to work tearing down decades’ worth of legislation guaranteeing a women dominion over her own body.

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The Bottom of The Barrel Award #10: Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer

Maybe she had diarrhea after eating some Mexican food and the pain she felt in her clenched asshole was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Maybe she desperately wants to watch Telanovelas but she can’t understand the language so she lashes out against those that can.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #9: Fox News Channel

But leave it up to this week’s “winners” to find a way to fuck up the good vibes. Apparently, as an athlete if you don’t wrap yourself in stars, stripes, red, white and blue, you are not enough of a patriot for some on Fox News. And apparently if you’re in the audience at an event, if an American wins the Gold Medal, you are to stand up, and scream at the top of your lungs, “U-S-A! U-S-A!” because if you don’t, you’re not as patriotic as you should be. That’s right, Fox News commentators took on themselves to chastise Olympic goers and our Olympics athletes for their perceived lack of patriotism.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #8: House Republicans

If for some reason a rape victim doesn’t find out about the double insult of getting impregnated by her attacker until week 21 or later, she has to carry that baby to full term, or at least that’s what the House Republicans wanted to have be the case in D.C. The same goes for a woman who was violated by her own family. We have gotten to the point where Pro-Birth people are willing to subject rape and incest victims to more trauma, stress and pain because God forbid a non-viable embryo that only exists thanks to a horrible crime perpetrated on an innocent woman be terminated before it can even have a sentient thought.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #7: Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid

Of course there would be blow-back. Blow-back from all sides most likely. He’d be told it’s too soon; that he’s politicizing a tragedy. But so fucking what? “Politicizing” has become a buzzword in political-land. Yes, there has been some absolute demagoguery going on since the Aurora tragedy. Mike Huckabee for instance would’ve been receiving this award for his brazen, stupid and ignorant commentary that blamed atheism for the shooting. However, Reid should be better than that. It’s not politicizing the event to take a step back and say, “This is a good time in this country for us to really discuss whether civilians should have access to the kinds of weapons soldiers do.”

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #6: Rush Limbaugh

Limbaugh is demonizing President Obama as un-American for stating in very clear terms what the real American Dream is: sharing of success. Nothing is better for the country than when everyone, from the top to the bottom, shares in our mutual successes and learns from our mutual failures. The American Dream is only attainable when we recognize that everyone plays a part, and that every part is vital. Somehow that’s been lost on the last two generations of Conservatives. They’d rather view the rich as Gods, and those who simply ask that the Middle Class not be decimated for the sake of a few extra percentage points of profit margin are the Devil.

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The Bottom of the Barrel Award #5: House Republicans

Everything about the Republicans in Congress these last four years has been shameful. Ever since Obama soundly trounced McCain in November 2008, they’ve been calculating, rubbing the welt on their collective asses as they plotted to obstruct, block and choke the life out of the economic recovery so they could turn Obama into Carter. That’s their recipe for winning this fall. Turn Obama into Carter and Romney into Reagan. Sadly, it’s working to a certain extent. The economy’s recovery is happening, but not very quickly, and without Obama creating more government jobs (as Reagan and Bush II did during their recession recoveries), the unemployment number is still hovering in the 8.2% range.

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