Birther and 9/11 Truther Dubious About ‘Fake News’ of Russia/Trump Collusion

HOBART, ARKANSAS — Clem O’Connell, host of “Totally and Legitimately Biased America,” a right-wing podcast of moderate success, is a self-described “Birther and seeker of all truth.” That means, Clem explains, that he not only believes former President Barack Obama was not born in America, and also that both 9/11 and the Sandy Hook Massacre were both staged, “false flag” events. What Mr. O’Connell does not believe in, he told his podcast audience this weekend, is “any of these fake news accounts about Trump and Russia.”

“Sure, he came back from his first trip abroad and immediately insulted one of our longest and strongest European allies,” Clem admitted, “and then his very next tweet was sucking Putin’s dick, but what does that really mean? Other than he praised our adversary — the same one that wanted him elected — and insulted our ally?”

Mr. O’Connell was referring to a pair of tweets Trump sent on Tuesday morning. In them, Mr. Trump blasted Germany for what he called a “MASSIVE trade deficit” and not paying their full portion of NATO costs. Then, less than an hour later, the president tweeted about Russian officials laughing at the U.S. because it’s “fake news” that there was any collusion between his campaign and Russia.


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“I just don’t see it, pardon me very much, okay,” Clem said to his audience, “I just don’t see any evidence. Lots a fake news about it, but unless Fox or Breitbart or InfoWars run it, I don’t trust it.”

Clem did admit that he’s seen stories that initially made him wonder if “there’s any meat on that bone.”




“I mean, Paul Manafort was a big deal in the Trump campaign, and then once all the Russia stuff about him came out, he was gone,” Clem said, “and then there’s Roger Stone and Carter Page in the same kinda situations. And of course, Jared Kushner was probably working on a back channel to the Russians to keep communication between the White House and the Kremlin secret, but…but, still, that doesn’t mean his campaign colluding with Russia, just because these men all lied about meetings they had with Russians in secret!”

Mr. O’Connell says he was even temporarily shaken by the fact that Attorney General Jeff Sessions had to recuse himself from the Russia investigation.

“I mean, shit,” Clem said, “that never looks good…lying under oath to Congress and then having to recuse yourself from an investigation. Then again, he turned right around and had a big hand in firing James Comey, so they must have worked all that out, and that proves he’s totally innocent, obviously.”


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Ultimately, Clem says that he’d have to see a “lot more evidence than just a bunch of people closely tied to Trump colluding with Russia” to convince him that the Trump campaign colluded with Russia. He said that evidence must come in the form of “irrefutable, undeniable” sources such as World Net Daily and “whatever basement Tammy Lahren broadcasts from nowadays.”

“Now, coming up after the break we discuss just how many bombs were on the second plane that flew into Tower 2,” Clem said, “and whether or not the crisis actors for Sandy Hook were involved, and of course, just how many copies of Obama’s real birth certificate were in the Pentagon when it was attacked.”


You can follow James on Twitter @JamesSchlarmann.

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About James Schlarmann 1818 Articles
James is the founding contributor and editor-in-chief of The Political Garbage Chute, a political satire and commentary site, which can be found on Facebook as well. You definitely should not give that much a shit about his opinions.
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