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Home
2017
February
Monthly Archives: February, 2017
Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
MAGA News
Sub-President Trump Signs Executive Order Forcing McDonald’s To Give Him Extra McNugget Sauce For Free
Sub-President Trump really loves his nuggets, and he really loves his nugget sauce, and he thinks he should get all the sauce he wants for free.
February 8, 2017
MAGA News
Betsy DeVos Receives Lovely Congratulatory Edible Arrangement From The Taliban
Religious sycophants of all stripes just love that Betsy DeVos was able to buy her way into the highest levels of government.
February 8, 2017
MAGA News
National Association of Grizzly Bears Issues Statement on Betsy DeVos’ Confirmation
The country's largest grizzly bear advocacy group has issued a strong letter of condemnation to the U.S. Senate for confirming Betsy DeVos.
February 7, 2017
MAGA News
Betsy DeVos Orders Immediate Flattening Of All School Globes
Just moments after being confirmed as the new Education Secretary, Betsy DeVos orders all the globes in American schools flattened.
February 7, 2017
MAGA News
Sub-President Trump Proposes Cutting Social Security To Pay For Bowling Green Massacre Memorial
Sub-President Trump wants to honor the brave men and women who died serving their country during the Bowling Green Massacre.
February 7, 2017
MAGA News
Quebec Shooter Thanks Sub-President Trump For Bringing Attention To Terror Attacks Ignored By Mainstream Media
The Quebec shooter who killed six and injured more at a mosque thanks Sub-President Trump for his effort to publicize terror attacks.
February 7, 2017
MAGA News
Trump: ‘As Long As Steve, Mike, and Vladimir Say I Can, I Call All My Own Shots!’
Co-President Donald Trump really wants you to believe he alone makes all the decisions, and he just got permission to tell us all that himself.
February 6, 2017
MAGA News
Trump Signs Over “Power of Attorney and/or Presidency” To Steve Bannon In His Absence
If Trump leaves the room, he wants to know his buddy Steve Bannon can fill-in for him, in case we need to nuke Ohio or something.
February 6, 2017
MAGA News
Trump Signs Executive Order To Make Approval Ratings Work Like Golf Scores
President Trump's historically low approval ratings might have been embarrassing to him for a brief time.
February 6, 2017
MAGA News
President Trump’s New Executive Order Declares The Patriots Super Bowl Winners ‘No Matter What Happens On The Field’
To help out his dear friends, Trump has signed an executive order declaring the New England Patriots the winners of Super Bowl LI.
February 5, 2017
MAGA News
White House Announces Super Bowl Pre-Game Show Will Feature Tribute To Bowling Green Massacre Victims
During the pre-game show before Super Bowl LI, a tribute to the fallen heroes of the Bowling Green Massacre will air.
February 4, 2017
MAGA News
The Previously Untold Story Of A Hero Who Survived Jade Helm But Fell During The Bowling Green Massacre
One man served during two of America's most harrowing domestic combat events in the last five years. This is his alternatively true story.
February 4, 2017
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Latest articles
Tech
You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck
The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
April 24, 2024
Arts & Entertainment
A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me
Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
April 19, 2024
Criminal Justice
Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials
"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
April 17, 2024
Women's Rights
The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus
"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...
April 12, 2024
