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Monthly Archives: February, 2017

Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
MAGA News

Trump Asks NASA To Verify Newly Discovered Planets Also Revolve Around Him

Co-President Donald Trump reached out to the "space nerds" at NASA to help him glean just how much he should care about the new planets.
Economy

Congressional Republican Explains Why Poor Kids Don’t Need Both Food and An Education

One Congressional Republican attempts to explain to reporters and the American people why poor kids should choose between smarts and food.
MAGA News

New EPA Head Scott Pruitt: “Maybe Mother Earth Shouldn’t Dress Like That If She Doesn’t Want Us Raping Her”

New EPA chief Scott Pruitt recently gave his first official remarks as the man charged with running the government agency that protects our environment.
MAGA News

Betsy DeVos Wants 3 R’s Officially Changed To “Reading, Reciting, and Regurgitating The Bible”

Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos wants schools to get back to the basics. As in, the very, very basics. As in, one book for all classes.
MAGA News

Trump Signs EO Declaring Electoral College Margin Of Victory “Amazing And Historical”

Co-President Donald Trump signed an order relating to his Electoral College victory that he hopes helps the country "move on" from the election last year.
MAGA News

Trump Gets Go-Ahead From Putin To Make Steve Bannon His Official Co-President

Thanks to Russian President Vladimir Putin giving the approval necessary, Steve Bannon is now officially the Co-President.
MAGA News

Trump Offers ‘Swedishland’ His ‘Deepest Pussy Grabs And Condolences’

President Trump offers sympathies to Sweden in his own, unique, purely Trumpian way.
MAGA News

CIA Warns More Fictitious Terror Attacks May Be On The Way

Newly confirmed CIA Director Mike Pompeo has a grave and dire warning for all Americans in regards to fake terror attacks.
LGTBQ+

13 Year Old Trans Boy Thinks Milo Yiannopoulos Is A ‘Totally Creepy Perv’

A young trans boy wrote a scathing letter to the editor blasting the hypocrisy of Milo Yiannopoulos championing sexual assault of minors.
MAGA News

Senate Confirms Billionaire Fox As Secretary Of Hen House Defense On Mostly Party Lines

As the Senate confirms another of his cabinet picks, Trump's administration is starting to really take shape.
MAGA News

Trump To Sign Executive Order Declaring Civil War “A Tie” And Mar-A-Lago The Official Southern White House

Can Sub-President Trump rechristen his Florida compound as The Southern White House?
MAGA News

White House Issues Details On ‘Person Of Interest’ In Swedish Terror Attack

The Trump/Bannon White House has issued an alert looking for a person of interest in the deadly attacks in Sweden.
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Latest articles

Tech

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...
Arts & Entertainment

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....
Criminal Justice

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
Women's Rights

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)